How to be an average Bhutanese

I am born in the Land of the Thunder Dragon. My country is very fortunate and lucky to have me in this land. I believe I am the center of the world. Therefore, I expect my country to do all of the below for me.

I expect my country to make laws and rules according to my likes and dislikes. First, while being born I expect my mother’s obstetrician to be very humble. It doesn’t matter how much the hospital staff is tired and over worked. I expect them to listen to my every rant, be it useless or baseless, with their heads held down. Not just when I am born but also when I fall sick in my later years. I might be having the common flu or light bruises, but when I present myself to the health staff, I expect them to leave all the other patients which not only did arrive before me, but, also whose life might be hanging by a string.

I also expect them to take the blame if I have not completed my dose of medication, and have not recovered from my illness, because I believe that an illiterate villager will know more about me and can perform supernatural deeds to kill the ever evolving virus in my body.

After I am enrolled into school which is the part of the free education system provided by my government, I want my teachers to take every responsibility for me. It doesn’t matter if i study or not, but I expect them to pass me in the exams so that I can flaunt my fragmented knowledge of everything. However, they are not allowed to blame my parents for what i do after school, let it be not studying or hanging out in shady areas and doing things that are not to be done. If they punish me in anyways for breaking school rules, they shall experience the wrath unleashed upon them by my parents through the network of people my parents know. I, for the matter of fact, don’t care for their age or how much they are overworked and underpaid.

When I complete my education, I expect my government to create jobs for me and I expect it to be a desktop where I have to work only for 8 hours a day which includes my lunch hours. I don’t want to go through any form of examination to get a job because I don’t want my folks to know that I have wasted my time abroad by not studying.

After getting employed, I don’t want to give in 100% to my work as I like to relax and do the least possible amount of work. When the boss or Dasho is away from the office I would like to leave my office no matter how important my department is for my country and her people. I expect the Human Resource Department along with the concerned institution to send me on tours and trainings which might not have anything to do with me and my position in the department. I don’t really care about the rules and regulation set up by institution. If I can’t get a job in the government sector, I expect my parents will search a job for me in the corporate or any institution through the means of corruption and nepotism.

What I want my country to know is that I am the center of the universe and I expect my country to accept all the flaws, as I actually don’t have any, and continue to service me till I depart this world. In return, I shall contribute a little or nothing, for I believe in GNH, Gross ‘Ngagi’ (mine) Happiness and not Gross National Happiness.

By: Avinash Pradhan

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