The life of sex workers

Forced into sex work by financial necessity, some section of the Bhutanese women are navigating a minefield of stigma, exploitation, and systemic neglect, with many expressing a deep desire to leave the profession if viable opportunities were available.

Two sex workers in Bhutan, aged 24 and 33, on the condition of anonymity, shared their personal stories with The Bhutanese, shedding light on the challenges and circumstances that led them to their current profession.

The 24-year-old said, “Earlier, I lived with my husband and child, depending on him financially. However, after our divorce, I had to look after my child alone. It became difficult to sustain our livelihood, and with no other options, I started working as a sex worker. It’s been a year now.”

She mentioned that her husband is currently working abroad, and they maintain cordial communication to discuss matters related to their child.

The 33-year-old shared a similar struggle, and said, “Like many others, my early marriage led to financial instability. When my marriage ended, I had no personal income and no choice but to take up this work.”

Before her divorce, she managed a shop owned by her husband, which she had to leave behind when their marriage ended. Both women emphasized that financial necessity, rather than choice, drove them to enter the profession.

The 24-year-old said that she married at 18 and lived with her husband’s family, becoming entirely dependent on him. Similarly, the 33-year-old was married at 20 and faced the same reliance on her partner. When their marriages ended, both were left without financial stability or alternative means of income.

The 24-year-old said, “Sex work was never an immediate choice. It became a means of survival to raise my child and sustain myself.”

Likewise, the 33-year-old, said, “Sex work was never a choice; it became a necessity. If I were financially sound, I would have never done it.”

Both women acknowledged that the previous government offered some training programs but they found the training programs were unaligned to their interests.

The 24-year-old said, “I’m interested in running a business or becoming a chef or barista, but the choices given never matched my aspirations. If I had received the right training, I could have opened a café or bar.”

The 33-year-old said, “I share similar intentions. Earlier, I received training as an outreach worker for four months as a midwife, but nothing was planned beyond the training. We were supposed to go out and work, but no opportunities materialized.”

Both women expressed a strong desire to leave sex work if provided with training in fields aligned with their interests and skills. However, they highlighted another significant hurdle: educational qualifications. Many sex workers have only completed grades 7 or 8, far below the grade 10 or 12 certificates required for most jobs or opportunities to work abroad.

The women also spoke about the professional and personal challenges they face.

“One of the biggest issues is blackmail. Clients often keep previous text messages and use them to threaten us, demanding free services under the threat of exposing us on social media or forums. Some of our friends have faced physical violence, been beaten, or left unpaid with injuries,” said the 24-year-old.

They also noted violence from partners who discover their involvement in sex work. In some cases, this leads to separation, while in others, the relationship continues because the other party is financially dependent on the sex worker.

“We live in constant fear. Some clients call us to their homes or hotels, where we risk confrontations with family members, like a wife coming to attack us,” they said.

The 24-year-old recalled how she got her first client through a friend. “I was scared when it happened the first time, but I couldn’t go back because I needed the money,” she said.

Both women expressed fear that their children might grow up and discover their profession. “Given a chance, we would really want to change our work and live a more dignified life,” they said.

Instances of harassment are disturbingly common. Clients sometimes exploit their power, coercing sex workers into situations beyond their consent.

“Sometimes clients introduce us to their friends and pressure us to sleep with them. Later, they share our pictures and rates in Telegram groups,” they said.

The legal system also falls short of offering protection. In some cases, officials have behaved inappropriately toward sex workers during legal proceedings. A 33-year-old recounted a distressing incident she said that while assisting a relative with a legal case, “An official groped me, turned off the lights, and asked me to sleep with him.”

Likewise, stigma extends to the healthcare system, where workers often face judgment instead of support. “When someone visits multiple times for the same STI, health workers question them harshly. This judgmental approach discourages individuals from seeking treatment, leading to prolonged health issues as some infections remain untreated for years,” they said.

Despite these struggles, many sex workers do not seek mental health support. Instead, they turn to alcohol or substance abuse as a coping mechanism.

“We’ve never considered seeking mental health help,” they said.

Sex workers feel that decriminalization is a distant dream, if achievable at all. However, they emphasize the urgent need for a support system a help desk dedicated to addressing their legal and health concerns.

“We are a vulnerable group, overlooked and unacknowledged. A place to report issues and seek help would make a huge difference,” they said.

Currently, the number of sex workers has risen, partly due to economic challenges and the closure of Drayangs (entertainment hubs). The two girls, however, never worked in Drayangs.

“At least girls used to earn a salary when Drayangs were open. Training programs offered during the previous government’s tenure, such as baking or beautician courses, were often seen as unrealistic due to the limited income potential and lack of startup funds for businesses,” they said.

Additionally, they revealed that underage school and college students are secretly engaging in sex work, often hiding their age. Some individuals take up sex work as a side hustle to supplement their income, while others do so out of sheer financial necessity.

Most sex workers express a willingness to leave the profession if better opportunities were available. “With the money we earn, we support our parents and children, just like anyone else in any other profession. But if given a chance, we would leave this work,” they said.

Another reason is they do not want their children to hear that their parent is a sex worker and go through stigma.